Why I Don't Make Everything for Someone Else

Image created with AI using ChatGPT.

For a long time, a lot of my crafting had a destination before I ever started. A card was going to someone. A handmade item might become a gift, a donation, something for a church bazaar, or something I could sell. There was usually a reason for making it and often a person waiting at the other end.

I still love making for other people. There is something special about choosing colors with someone in mind, thinking about what they would like, and imagining them opening something I made with my own hands. Handmade gifts carry time inside them, and I don't take that lightly.

But I've also learned that I don't have to make everything for someone else. I am allowed to make things just for me. That sounds obvious, but I don't think it always feels obvious to people who are used to giving. When crafting becomes connected to gifts, donations, sales, or other people's needs, it can start feeling a little strange to spend hours making something simply because we want it ourselves.

I've had to remind myself that enjoying the things I make isn't selfish. I'm part of my own household. I live in my home. I wear clothes, use bags, wrap up in blankets, decorate spaces, and enjoy pretty things too. Why shouldn't some of my creativity stay here? I also love having a built-in display case upstairs, right outside my craft space, where I can showcase some of my makes that are strictly for me to look at every day and admire. I suspect a lot of us crafters have a little corner or space where we display not only what others have made for us, but what we've made for ourselves too.

Making for myself also changes the decision-making process. I don't have to wonder whether someone else likes the color or worry about whether a style is popular. I don't have to think about what would sell or what would appeal to the largest number of customers. I can choose the odd little detail that makes me happy simply because it makes me happy.

That freedom can be refreshing. It also helps me learn what I actually like. When I'm creating for someone else, their preferences are naturally on my mind. When I create for myself, I notice my own patterns: the colors I reach for, the textures I enjoy, the kinds of projects I want around me, and the things I use over and over again.

Sometimes a project made just for me becomes an experiment too. I can try a new technique without worrying about messing up or not having a pristine finished object. I can test a new stitch, work with unfamiliar fabric, change the plan halfway through, or live with the finished item and see what I would do differently next time.

Of course, there is another funny thing about making for myself: sometimes I finish something, love it, but end up not keeping it, and it finds its way into a birthday card or gift for a friend instead. That's okay, because I love to give. The point isn't that I must keep everything I make. Goodness knows I don't have room for that! The point is that the project didn't need an outside reason to deserve being made.

Creativity can be generous without always being given away. The hours I spend crocheting, sewing, stitching, or playing with paper give something back to me too. They give me peace and quiet, keep me calm, let me solve little problems, and give me the pleasure of making something that didn't exist before. Sometimes that's the entire purpose of the project, and I think that's enough.

I'll always make gifts. I'll always enjoy blessing other people with something handmade when I can. I'll still make cards for the people and occasions that matter to me. But I don't believe every project needs a recipient waiting in the wings.

Sometimes the person I'm making it for is me. And she counts too.